RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and discussion thread too?
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 3/24/2010 1:59:40 PM
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LilMamaHen
Posts: 19
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I guess my birth was very "unnatural"...I had a scheduled c-section by choice....I was too scared of childbirth to even attempt vaginal delivery....Childbirth has been one of my worst fears anyway, so when my doctor told me that my pelvis was on the small side, I jumped at the chance to have a c-section...I am currently pregnant with my second child and a part of me would like to know what it is like to have a vaginal delivery, and then another part of me is scared to death of it.
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 3/24/2010 5:22:53 PM
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danas_mom
Posts: 359
Joined: 6/17/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
I'm giving fair warning....if you don't want to read a c-section horror story, don't read this thread.
Just offering some ((((HUGS)))). Your experience brought back a flood of memories of my childrens' births and brought tears to my eyes.
quote:
But I never never NEVER EVER want to experience it again.
I completely understand that feeling and I know how hard it is to deal with. More ((((HUGS))).
_____________________________
...work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work. ~ 1 Cor 3:13
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 3/24/2010 9:44:45 PM
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JoyfulLady
Posts: 29
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From: Kansas
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Neither of my c-sections were very pleasant experiences. 
And, if I would have pushed for a VBAC with my second I still wouldn't have been able to do it, since he was breech.
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*Amber*
My Blog
Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you decide to see beyond the imperfections.
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 3/28/2010 5:38:53 AM
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LilMamaHen
Posts: 19
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The anesthesiologist had trouble getting my spinal in, it had something to do with my bones being close together or something....he had to try for a little while to get it in and it felt uncomfortable.....my backbone ached as he was pushing trying to get that thing in my back. I dread going through that again, I hope next time the spinal will go in easier.
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 3/29/2010 7:40:49 PM
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SurpassingPeace
Posts: 241
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Sharon did it hurt or did you just feel it? I felt most of that but it didn't hurt. There was definately pressure and it was uncomfortable but not painfully. I did throw up alot but that is just my reaction, I am used to it. If you ever did it again and had to have a c-section, I would talk to your doc about general anastetic. I am sorry it was so horrible for you.
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Karen
Proud Member of the Imperfect Wives' Club
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 3/29/2010 10:31:56 PM
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LilMamaHen
Posts: 19
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My spinal really wasn't all that bad....he had trouble getting it in..it caused my back bone to ache while he was trying to get it in, but it was nothing that was really bad or anything.....
I felt pressure as the baby was being pulled out...it wasn't painful, but i felt pressure up high like something really heavy was sitting on my rib cage or something....
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 3/29/2010 11:15:16 PM
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sharonjef2007
Posts: 1753
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If I'm ever pregnant again I will talk to my doctor about it. My annual exam is in November so I may bring it up then. Fortunatly right now I am not pregnant, and that is a good thing.
They had to try twice to get the needle in the right place. I didn't feel any pain at all the second time, but I did the first. And, she was really trying hard to shove it in the first time to the point where my whole body moved with it. Kind of like when someone is giving you a back massage and your whole torso moves back and forth. Didn't make me feel too good. The doctor had to give me a talking to about relaxing and the second try went right in, no problem.
Unfortunatly though, 5 months later and when I move or bend or anything I can still feel exactly where it was. And, my whole back still is not right. But I think that has to do more with the pregnancy than the epi/spinal.
ETA...surpassing...I just realized you asked about the c-section itself, not the epi. And yes, it did actually hurt....A LOT!!!! I had a little bit of relief once they were done working on me but mostly not until the epi part kicked in. And then the anestesia lady kept telling me that it was normal to feel what I was feeling and that she had given me all the meds she could.
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/10/2010 11:41:11 PM
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sharonjef2007
Posts: 1753
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Ok, so quick question here. For you c-section gals, do you ever feel like you were cheated out of something with not having a vaginal birth? I know envy is not good, but that is how I feel sometimes when I read about all the women who have no issues with their labors and deliveries. It makes me sad.
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/11/2010 2:03:43 AM
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IAMJulie
Posts: 101
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From: WA
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I sure hope it's OK. I had three vaginal births before my C and I still feel like I was cheated. I'm not ungrateful for my healthy baby or that we did the C to prevent some potential serious risks but I had a dream of what my fourth birth was going to be like and I'm mourning the loss of that experience.
All in all my recovery after the C has been easier and faster (so far at two-weeks post) than with my vaginal births, the c-section itself was quick and easy and I got to hold my baby almost right away and there have been no complications from the c-section and yet some aspects still make me rather emotional. Mostly when I hear about someone's birth story that is exactly what I was hoping for. I used to feel nothing but happiness for them and now I just feel sad for me. And then I feel bad about it. Bah!
_____________________________
Julie, wife to Rob, mom to son Gabriel (2/04), daughter Zion (10/06), son Gideon (4/08) and one more due June 29, '10, dog Towzer, cats Benny and Maisy, Allie the rabbit and a few fish. www.wellblessed.blogspot.com :)
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/11/2010 9:03:16 AM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 2236
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From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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quote:
I had a dream of what my fourth birth was going to be like and I'm mourning the loss of that experience.
Boy, do I relate to that. I am just now, almost 2 years later, allowing myself to mourn for all of the circumstances around Esther's birth. Brian's accident drastically changed my dreams for her delivery. Add to that my only full induction, an epidural that didn't work, and the hardest birth out of all of them even though it was also the shortest.
Sure, women's bodies were made to have babies naturally. And then Eve sinned. We now live in a fallen world, and nothing is the same. Including our bodies.
I have not had a section, but I have had two wonderful vaginal deliveries and two terror filled ones. So even a vaginal birth does not guarantee a "perfect birth". I think I had one of those out of the four...and I had an epidural, so many wouldn't claim it as a perfect birth. But for me, it was a wonderful delivery.
Whatever your birth experiences, give yourself permission to grieve if you need to. Sometimes we need to do that to get to the point of acceptance. It is what it is and it's not something you can change by dwelling on it, but at the same time, it's okay to admit things didn't go how you would have liked. Just don't get stuck there.
Oh, and I finally got the "natural labor" I always wanted with Esther. They shut off pitocin when they broke my water, so it wasn't the induction that caused my awful labor. Holy cow...no thanks. My body was made for the epidural. LOL
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/11/2010 10:28:44 AM
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macokjc
Posts: 191
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quote:
I have not had a section, but I have had two wonderful vaginal deliveries and two terror filled ones. So even a vaginal birth does not guarantee a "perfect birth". I think I had one of those out of the four...and I had an epidural, so many wouldn't claim it as a perfect birth. But for me, it was a wonderful delivery.
Sharon, I am sorry that you feel this way. I have not had a section, so I don't know what you are going through. I have had, however, 5 vaginal births, and let me tell you - they were nothing to write home about. Like Donna, my best delivery was a very happy-epidural one, and my worst was a pitocin induced no-drugs one. I didn't magically grow a halo and angel wings after I gave birth with no drugs.
Going on a soapbox here:
The miracle of birth for me is not the birth - it is the fact that we can grow and support a baby in our bodies. That this tiny being is formed from just a seed, and develops into a person. That is truly a miracle. The process of birth is simply the way that God designed our body to expell a baby. If you think about our digestive system, (ick) our body expels a lot of things. The only difference is what has come out. Sometimes, just like every other function in our body - it doesn't work like God intended. (Like Donna said - sin has entered into the world and caused our bodies to degenerate.) WHY, then, do woman act like giving birth is this some magical process that brings you to a higher level. Let me tell you, there is NO crown in heaven for having a vaginal. Or having a drug-free vaginal. If that is what one desires, fine - I'm all for a woman's right to deliver how she wants. But let's get off our high horses and pretend that we are some super-woman because we gave birth unassisted in a wading pool in our back yards. How one gives birth DOES NOT, and NEVER WILL make them a better person, wife, mother, or human being. Period. As woman we need to stop living up to the challenge of being "perfect" and having everything "perfect", and live each day, putting one foot in front of the other and asking God what he has for us this day.
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/11/2010 3:21:20 PM
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daughter_of_faith
Posts: 857
Joined: 1/10/2008
From: Oregon
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I had a C-section with J; however, I am hoping I can have a VBAC with this baby. Under the circumstances, I am not sure how likely this will be (local hospital has banned VBACs). There are other options though and I am carefully weighing them.
Julie, that is good that you got to hold your baby right after birth. I didn't have the opportunity to hold J until sometime later and I had to ask and then wait for them to bring him to me. That is the part of delivery that I wish were different, but all in all...it ended up working out: healthy baby & healthy mama. My recovery wasn't very quick though.
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/11/2010 7:51:18 PM
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manda59
Posts: 3351
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After my first baby (emergency C-section). I didn't feel cheated, just anxious and annoyed for not having been able to do it all myself "properly". I can remember looking at mums pushing strollers in town and wonder if they'd been able to do it right.
No-one else put the pressure on me - it was all something I did to myself.
I had a VBAC with my second, and, though I felt some sense of achievement for having done it, the actual overall experience wasn't wonderful, and, putting both experiences side by side there really wasn't much to choose between them. And, weighing it all up later on (and still living with the consequences of the vaginal delivery nearly 17 yrs later, I honestly think I preferred the C-section (though being awake would have been better than having general anaesthetic).
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/11/2010 9:26:28 PM
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sharonjef2007
Posts: 1753
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Maybe if the c-section had been a better experience, I'd feel different. You are right, it is what it is and I can't change it. But I do have regrets on several things related to the birth of my son. And considering how so many hospitals and doctors won't even consider a VBAC, it is not just about the birth I already had but dreading that in the future too. Yes, I know I have more info and can make better decisions, but nothing is ever guaranteed when it comes to pregnancy and giving birth. That fact makes me just want to adopt, get my tubes tied and call it a day.
Sorry, I guess I'm just having a poor me moment.
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/11/2010 9:43:12 PM
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danas_mom
Posts: 359
Joined: 6/17/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
Maybe if the c-section had been a better experience, I'd feel different.
This is me too. My first two sections were emergencies, and I didn't get a choice with my last one (plus my FIL was in the hospital dying the weekend I was in the hospital having my son) so I can't honestly say I have very good memories about any of their births, other than of course the fact that they were here and healthy.
It's been almost 12 years since my first c-section (and 6 years since my third) and I still can't bring myself to feel like I actually "gave birth" to any of my children. I doubt I ever will. And that's not pressure from society or anything like that  it's just the way I feel. Most of the birth stories I heard going into labor with my first were from women who had experienced both sections and vaginal deliveries, and all of them who had experienced both told me they preferred the section, so I was REALLY thrown for a loop after my daughter was born and I felt such an immense depression about it. It wasn't until months later (in fact, I think I was pregnant with my second by that time, so it was about a year and a half later) that I stumbled across a website that had women freely talking about being disappointed that they had not been able to have a vaginal delivery. Until then, I truly thought something was just wrong with me for feeling that way.
_____________________________
...work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work. ~ 1 Cor 3:13
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RE: Do we need an UNNatural childbirth support and disc... - 7/11/2010 9:49:08 PM
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sharonjef2007
Posts: 1753
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Well, I guess knowing that I'm not alone in my feelings is somewhat comforting.
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